4 Lies Leaders Believe about Accountability Conversations
Do you experience anxiety around the concept of accountability conversations? You are not alone. While I have met some individuals that thrive on conflict, many leaders prefer to dodge these important conversations due to distressing personal experiences or limiting beliefs.
Let’s extinguish the top 4 lies I have seen leaders buy into about accountability conversations.
Lie: Accountability is a last resort after something bad has happened.
If you only engage in accountability conversations when your team members have done something wrong, then you are missing out on an incredible opportunity to fuel your team’s motivation. As supervisors and managers, we can get pretty busy and end up being professional fire fighters if we are not careful, and that’s exactly how accountability gets its bad reputation. We end up spinning our wheels and jumping from one thing to the next until we are forced to pause and have accountability conversations in order to stop the bleeding from an undesirable situation.
The truth is that accountability conversations are simply ownership conversations. The question being answered is: “What does ownership look like for this focused target?” Beyond addressing how to turn behavior around or correct an issue, you can inspire growth and progress on the front end (or long before things go wrong). Accountability questions look like these: Who is going to own a team members’ growth, and how will that happen? Who is going to own increasing profits, and how will that happen? What do we need in order to accomplish our goal, and what specific part will each person on your team play?
Accountability means having transparent conversations about expectations of ownership that are focused on forward momentum. When you reflect upon your conversations with your team members, do you find they are primarily geared toward putting out fires and correcting the faults of your team members? If so, how can you adjust your accountability conversations to address ownership on the front-end as you set expectations for moving forward?
Lie: I have to be the one to hold my team members accountable.
It must be pretty stressful to have the workload of 12 hands when we were designed to have two. If accountability means ownership, and you are not distributing ownership to your team members, then you will find everything landing on your plate. You will be exhausted, fighting fires, and progressively behind every day. If you can share the load, on the other hand, you can experience improved productivity, energy, and relationships with your team members.
The key to ensuring that ownership is distributed appropriately is to have those front-end accountability conversations we just discussed to establish expectations. Think back to your last conversation with an employee about expectations. Was your conversation clear with the team member? What did you do to ensure the transfer of ownership actually occurred and that a mutual understanding was reached? What opportunities did you provide to the team member to make it personally meaningful? Also, consider your attitude toward the team member - Did you genuinely believe in the team member and instill confidence in that employee?
If you own your part in the conversation, and the other person continues to miss the mark, ask for transparent feedback regarding the team member’s personal investment in the targeted outcome. What steps will the team member take to overcome any roadblocks in the desired outcome? What happens if the current trend continues?
Lie: Accountability conversations are difficult.
Sometimes we assign more drama to accountability conversations than they actually deserve. Many people fear conflict around accountability conversations relating to disciplinary action; however, these types of conversations do not result in arguments or rouge employees if you do them right. Here are 3 tips that will help you to mitigate conflict:
Maintain a positive mindset. If you envision the conversation will be a disaster, you are setting yourself up to experience a disaster. Instead, remember the purpose of disciplinary action: You are giving them an opportunity to turn their behavior around. If you were doing something wrong that could cost you your job, would you want to know about it? (Yes please!) Then consider how the person might best receive such information. What would a conversation look like that would result in both you and the employee maintaining a positive mindset and outlook for the future? What environment and format are most appropriate to help the message be received?
Have a road map for your conversation. Instead of “winging it” when it comes to delivering your message, plan it out. Many organizations have a form to provide guidance for such conversations; however, your delivery of the message will ultimately be what makes a difference in the outcome of the conversation. What are the desired takeaways for both the behavior change and the leader-follower relationship you want to have with this team member? What parts of the conversation will be directive as opposed to allowing input from the team member? How will you ensure the team member stays focused on his or her ownership of the issue at hand? How will you evaluate the authenticity of commitments made by the team member? How will you follow up with the team member’s progress? Follow me on LinkedIn for additional tips regarding your road map for accountability conversations.
Do your homework. All of these suggestions assume that you did your research by gathering facts prior to having accountability conversations. There is still one more piece of homework you will need to be successful: practice. Once you have your message outlined, make sure it comes out of your mouth as it was intended by practicing it out loud - to yourself or with another leader. Make it part of your muscle memory, so should you get nervous, you can still deliver your message effectively. If you have a mirror, pay attention to your body language to ensure it matches the tone of your message.
Which of these factors will you work on to help your accountability conversations become easier and have less potential for conflict?
Lie: I am afraid if I have an accountability conversation with my skilled employee, they will leave and hurt my team’s productivity.
In the context of accountability conversations around harmful behaviors and attitudes, many managers find themselves paralyzed because they fear losing significant skills, experience, or knowledge that team members possess.
First, consider that if you follow the tips already mentioned, you are reducing the potential for conflict as well as the likelihood that the team member will leave. Which of those tips will you use in your accountability conversations going forward?
Second, consider that behaviors and attitudes are contagious in the workplace. Not only will the behaviors and attitudes you allow infiltrate the culture of your team and eventually affect your team’s performance, you will also set a precedent for the future. Did you know applicants look for teams that align with their core values? What kind of future potential do you desire to attract - poor attitudes and behavior? No way!
Take a moment to reflect: What can be achieved when your team members have productive behaviors and positive attitudes? How can you bring awareness to team members about their impact on the team as well as their own careers? How can you refocus the team members on using their skills, experience, and knowledge in alignment with the team’s culture? What would front-end accountability conversations look like that can promote the desired attitudes and behaviors across your team?
The truth is that accountability conversations are points of feedback (positive and constructive) in your relationships with your team members. There are many things you can control about these conversations to minimize conflict as well as foster ownership of the desired behavior, performance, and relationship outcomes.
Do you have anxiety or limiting beliefs around accountability conversations? Let’s connect, so you can reach your full leadership potential.
